Growing Yourself Back Up: Understanding Emotional Regression by John Lee

Author:John Lee
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub, azw3
Publisher: Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony
Published: 2010-02-06T04:30:00+00:00

TIP 2

Cut the invisible strings that keep you tied to your family in behaviors that are no longer useful. Examples of such behaviors are:

NOT EXPRESSING ANGER AND GRIEF

NOT ASKING FOR WHAT YOU REALLY WANT AND NEED FROM YOUR FAMILY

KEEPING SECRETS FROM CERTAIN FAMILY MEMBERS

TRIANGULATING, MANIPULATING, OR MANEUVERING FOR POWER

One type of invisible string is a trust fund or inheritance. Karen is one of the most likable people you’ll ever meet, and she jumps through hoops to keep her father happy. She almost never disagrees with him in public, even when she knows he’s wrong. She dutifully visits him every Sunday, no matter what. Why? Because he controls her trust fund.

Fear of losing an inheritance can make us regress in a New York minute. It’s much easier to say good-bye to Mom or Dad if all you stand to inherit is their old mobile home parked on a little lot in Alabama. But if you feel that you have something substantial to lose, it’s hard to keep to your rhythms, to stay true to yourself, and to speak your truths, especially at family functions.

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